white moleskine my dad gave me
Notice: I was hesitant to begin writing in this notebook, because it looked so much better empty, but I eventually folded. It started as a place where I would write my ponderings in the early morning, but quickly evolved into an intimate place of prayer. Enjoy.
1/10/22
Fear dissipates with holy contact.
Shatter.
Make known.
My stained altar,
all I own.
Free me from the shackles of my vain pursuits.
Set my wandering feet on the path, on the rock.
Deep cries to deep. "Know me."
Digest my ambitious heart. Let the body of Christ reject what it will.
1/10/22
The fear of the Lord burns me clean.
As the ember of dawn coerces the fog of night.
The sun does not bargain with darkness.
Wisdom does not bargain with foolishness.
Holiness does not bargain with corruption.
Darkness is simply absence of light. So foolishness with wisdom, morality with disorder.
Sin deals in debts, moral calculus steeped in illusion.
Bankruptcy favors the foolish.
Darkness is a stranger to light, light is well acquainted with darkness.
The cosmos is quite theatrical. Photons romancing one another in the consuming implosion of a supernova. Meteor stalking and orbiting prey for light years, striking on a whim.
1/11/22
Passion is positive sum, generative.
Obsession is zero sum, repetitive.
Much is hereditary, much is conditioned. All formation is displayed in the present. We are the curators of our genome, building over time a worthy inheritance.
Speak to a stranger of truth, receive a blank stare. One must water down mystery for the masses. You can't digest truth without stomach pain.
Yes to truth is no to falsehood. Light invades darkness - traceless, quick, mysterious.
The soul: both particle and wave. One can't know both location and momentum.
I love you Lord. Your streams of mercy and renewal are enough for me. Only with you is my soul satiated, content, and curious.
Holy One, give me Your mind, Your heart, Your feelings, Your creativity, Your intellect, Your eyes, Your family, Your beauty.
There’s a lot more in the notebook, but need to step away. I’ll return and finish at a later date…